So this post is going to get a lot more personal than any of my others. When I started my blog, all I wanted to do on it was review whatever books I’ve read. And then it changed so I spoke about books, entertainment, and now even Bookworm Problems I face. But even with all of that I’ve never really been personal in my posts.

There’s a first time for everything.

I used to love writing.

Back when I was in secondary school, I discovered Wattpad. I wrote some original fiction on there which I absolutely loved doing. Then I discovered fan fictions.

Fan fictions were my favourite things to write. I wrote one based on my favourite book series at the time and around three or four others based on my favourite band at the time. And I loved it.

I used to look forward to getting home from school and writing. I loved the feedback I used to get and I even met one of my closest friends through them.

When I started college, I realised I had to focus on my work more than anything and didn’t write as much. It didn’t bother me too much because I knew I would have to give it up for college and I was sure that as soon as college finished, I would pick up my writing again – both fan fiction and original pieces.

But… that just didn’t happen. I finished college and got more hours at work and I decided that I couldn’t do regular updates any more but I promised myself I wouldn’t give up.

I broke that promise.

A few months later I deleted the Wattpad app, deciding I couldn’t go back to it again. I didn’t have the energy for writing at all around work because I was doing well above my contracted hours at work.

Everything’s changed now. I only work my contracted minimum hours, which has resulted in a lot of things but the one that is important here is that I have time to write. So six months ago, I decided to start again. Not on Wattpad, but in private.

Six months later, and I’m struggling. In that amount of time, I’ve barely written a hundred words. My heart isn’t in it any more and I struggle now to get my ideas down on paper. I can’t concentrate enough and my imagination isn’t good enough any more.

Writing is something that I used to absolutely love. It was my release of everything that I was feeling and I just can’t do that now.

I’m going to keep trying with my writing. I’ve always wanted to be an author and I still want to. But right now, I’m losing hope.

I feel like I’ve forgotten how to write about anything other than experiences from real life and I don’t feel like anyone would want to hear about my string of dodgy and disastrous jobs and lack of a social life.

Right now, I’m just hoping I can get back into writing again. I need that release I used to have.

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  1. I’m sad for you that you’ve lost the joy of writing because I know how much you used to love it. What about trying an app of writing prompts to spark something different, something you’ve never thought of? I have one my Kindle called Writing Challenge, some if the ideas it gives you are quite fun.

    Liked by 1 person

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